ADHD and Relationships

How has ADHD impacted your relationship with your significant other? What things have you and/or your partner done to adjust since being diagnosed? What challenges did you face and how did you overcome them? My fiancée and I are at breaking point and it just feels there’s a lack of commitment and understanding from both sides. My symptoms have worsened since being formally diagnosed, and I feel that even though we now have an answer as to why I do (or don’t do) certain things, I still get questioned and reprimanded, which then causes me to become overwhelmed, completely shut down, and put a wall up (depersonalisation and realisation kick in)

kabatty5404

1mo

I'm sorry that you are going through this. I don't have any good suggestions other than maybe couples counseling with an adhd specific counselor, but I am here for solidarity, letting you know you aren't alone with the extreme difficulties in relationships due to adhd. I tried everything I knew, but my live-in bf who had been talking about getting married got up and walked out on me 2 months ago. I tried from day one to tell him about the adhd, but he wouldn't even try to understand what it is, let alone listen and learn my triggers and what he can do to help me get back to center. I saw him for the last time today to give him the last of his things and mail. It broke me all over again. I have nothing left in me to move on and eventually even go on a date with someone else. He was my person, my ride or die. my forever. I truly hope a better outcome for you!

Sir Smiley

1mo

I’m so so sorry to hear that Kabatty! That’s absolutely horrible. What disappoints me most is the fact he never even tried to understand or find ways to make it work. That alone tells me he wasn’t meant for you and you deserve (and will find) someone so much better. Then you’ll look back at this moment and feel glad things worked out the way they did (I speak from experience). My (ex)gf of 15 years and mother of my 2 kids decided to play up and I caught her red handed. It absolutely broke me. The fact I gave up everything to make sure they all had a stable home, and everything they wanted or needed, only to have it thrown in my face like that, knowing full well I had been cheated on before. I was in one of the worst places of my life and saw no future on this planet. Fast forward 3 years I look back and am so glad she did something that gave me the motivation to walk away. I feel I have my life back now. Keep your chin held high and if you need to chat please don’t hesitate to reach out!

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